Hey Guys,
Please
excuse the radio silence of late! I never meant for it to go on this long! As I
mentioned in my last post, I've lost my mojo, well that’s not exactly the whole
story, but it’s the shortest explanation.
You want
the long story? Here you go
Lets go
back, **you may need to make a cuppa to
get through this** just saying….
When I
finished my 6 week course in the gym at the end of July I was delighted with my
results but I was also very tired. So I decided to give my body and weeks off
the gym to recover after the intense six weeks. But I found that the less I was
doing, the more tired I was, I wasn't off my healthy eating, I was just resting
the body! So the crazy tiredness seemed a little bit dramatic.
However I couldn't
shake it, I woke up after 8-10 hours of sleep more tired then when I went to
bed, everything became an effort, I didn't want to make plans to see anyone or
so anything. I just wanted to get through my days at work and get home so I could
rest and go to sleep again!!
I went to
see the doctor, he suggested I give my body the same amount of sleep every
night and not try to “catch up” on my sleep at the weekends! (I am guilty of
that, who doesn't love a lie in?)
He
suggested a 30 day course of vitamins and some light exercise to tire me out (not
that I needed it)
But the
tiredness wasn't going away, people were commenting that I looked awful and
pale and tired. It was getting me down BIG time, and I’m an emotional eater, so
me being sad and moany means me trying to fill my sad belly with lotas of junk
food! I was having good days and bad days with regards to food!
My weekly
weigh in’s for August were all attended (Is “I’m tired” a good enough reason to
skip? I didn't think so) But I was up one pound, down one pound. It was really
getting me down, and affecting all aspects of my life, I was trying to go to
the gym once a week and go for walks, but even during these, I wanted to cry
with tiredness!
So I went
back to visit my doctor, he took me seriously and sent me for bloods, he listed
a few things that it could be but also mentioned that it could just be “one of
those things” with no cause or solution!!
I was hoping that it wouldn't be the latter!! I wanted this to be labeled,
so that I could “fix” it and move on and get on with my life as a 29 year old
not a 29 year old behaving like a 90 year old!
The results
came back this morning and I've gotten the all clear for everything!! Yip,
according to the doctors there’s nothing at all wrong with me! This should fill
me with relief and happiness but it doesn't. if there’s nothing medically wrong
with me, then what is wrong with me?
Why am I so
tired all the time? I eat well, I exercise at least twice a week, I take
vitamins, I’m young and (as we've now established) healthy. I just don’t get
it. I’m ticking all the boxes but still I feel exhausted, look awful (think pale with luggage
under my eyes), have no energy, everything is an effort and I’m not feeling
very positive at all.
The doctor
recommend that I do more exercise and get some regular sleep. WTF!
So that’s my
story, are you still with me?
 |
| This is how I feel |
So the
solution, well there isn't one really but I've decided that instead of being
the whinge-bag Moaning Myrtle that I have been for the last 6 weeks (very sorry
my family and friends)
I’m going to
“Fake it till I Make it” So I've
signed up for another 6 week challenge in my gym, I’m going to go to the 2
boot-camp classes a week, even if I have to crawl there and cry my way through
it. I’m back to eating clean and I’m making plans to get out and stop allowing
myself to stay home and wallow in my own self pity and tiredness…. (even tho that’s
all I wanna do)
I’m hoping
that by not allowing myself to be negative to others or to myself, that positive
thinking will naturally come back to me and I’ll start to feel like myself
again.
So “Fake it till I Make it” is my new motto.
My nails
stayed bare for the whole month of August and oddly I didn't care! I think that was more of a warning sign to my
friends and family than the tiredness!! So I’m going to give myself one night a
week and paint my nails until I get back into the swing, I've still been buying
polish but not testing it out!! (very unlike me)
So I’ll
keep you posted on how this Operation “Fake
it till I Make it” goes for me.
Have any of
ye felt like this? I've come so far (20.5 lbs lost this year) and I’m refusing
to give up.. But its very tempting!
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