January 2015 Update

There’s something to be said about being a weight loss blogger who's kind of crap at losing weight. It’s embarrassing, and that’s why I haven’t been blogging all that much in the last few months.

I feel like my blog posts have become whingey and full of excuses, they’re aren't as positive or as progress-full (is that a word?) as I would like them to be….

But I think that this is ok? I’m not perfect, no body expects me to be and sometimes life gets in the way of things.

Also I’m like a bad penny, I might be down but I’m certainly not out. I refuse to give up. I’m not making much progress being a yoyo, but I’m refusing to give in and stay like this.

Because I’m not happy and I’m not comfortable, and I’m refusing to settle.. I've only got one body and I've been treating it like crap for years! Its taken me 30 years to realise this and now I’m sorry I've treated myself so badly!

Here’s a little update as to how I've been doing, January went well for me, I was eating good, cooking from scratch, trying a few new recipes, and not going berserk at the weekends (in my head weekend = food party/ all you can eat style! WHY!!!)

So facing the scales after non-food partying weekends was making me feel smug (& also expecting huge losses… why do I decide that 4 days in a row of good eating should equal half a stone gone?)

I was down, 1.5, 1.5, 3.5 and then I had a gain of 1.5.. which I wasn't expecting and I wasn't happy about. Shit happens eh? Yes it does, but what did I do? I ate my disappointment....literally!

Also the following week was my birthday week, so I had a night out, a hangover day/binge, followed by 2 dinners out for my birthday and wait for it….. 5 different kinds of cake for my birthday celebrations… yes, you read that correctly FIVE. .everyone is aware of my love affair with cake and all my lovely friends and family bought me cake for my birthday.. Sure it was my birthday and I was celebrating!!  So the 48 hours before facing the Slimming World weighing scales I had 2 dinners out and ate A LOT of cake

So there was no surprise when I jumped on the scales and had a gain of 5.5LBS

Yip, I managed to undo all of January's good eating and hard work in less than 7 days… But it didn't end there, Oh no, the birthday celebrations weren't over just yet!!

I was out with the lovely Slimming World ladies on Friday night for drinks and pizza slices, I was away on Saturday Night for my Birthday and we had car snacks (yes it’s a thing) and a 5 course dinner that evening followed by drinks (I don’t regret it, it was AMAZING.. and the Breakfast the following day… OMG **drooling just thinking about it**) All the photos are on my instagram page. Click HERE 

So here I am, its Monday AGAIN and I’m back on plan today.. my first day on plan is over 10 days, I’m guessing I’m back to the start again with my numbers... that wont be made official until Thursday night, so the next 4 days I am going to try to do a little bit of damage control and get the scales moving in the right direction again!!  I’m back in control again, I made my speed soup last night and that’s a baby step in the right direction at least…

I’m disappointed with myself but I enjoyed every single day of being off plan… but I’m ready to stop eating crap and treat my body properly, it won't thank me for the binge eating!!!

I don’t know what kind of penance would be recommend after that synful confession, but I  will definitely try harder. I have to if I want to start seeing results…..

January 2015 Stats
Week 1 = + 8.5
Week 2 = -1.5
Week 3 = -1.5
Week 4 = +1.5
Week 5 = + 5.5

Weight lost to date: 0lbs
Onwards and Downwards, the Slimming World way :)

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***Photos from Google Images***

Its the little things & Weigh In Week 1

Its the little things

Last week 3 good things happened to me

1. I had a none scale victory and bought my winter coat in a size smaller than I normally would, its     my first Parka style jacket and I love it, I had expected to have to buy it bigger to make it all cosy and snuggly, but no :) Also my boyfriend treated me to it, so it was doubley good

Parka from Tescos

2. I went to Spinning class last Monday evening even tho I wasn't feeling 100% and survived. I was proud of myself for not cancelling when that's what I really wanted to do.

3. I celebrated going out with my boyfriend 3 years by cooking dinner at home.

Dinner cooked by Moi

Cake = 8 syns

So I was feeling good and positive going to group on Thursday evening ( I was also mad to show off my new coat..lol)
I was up 1.5lbs.. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement, I felt like I've been pretty good these last few weeks and I saw a result in my new coat this week, so I was expecting a loss on the scales!!

So the gain could be down to exercise or cake, I don't regret either.

I'll take my non scale victory and my gain and keep going.. that's all I can do.......




Weight lost to date: 4.5lbs
Onwards and Downwards, the Slimming World way :)

Pre holiday Weigh In 2014

I'm sorry to report that I didn't get my one stone award last night at group!!
In fact I was up 1.5lbs, not the post I wanted to write just before I head away on my holidays.

I was full of good intentions and determination but sometimes life just gets in the way and that's what happened me this week. I wasn't as on it as I should have been! I guessed a few syn values of things, had a few slithers of peoples birthday cakes, and all these "little  tastes of things" add up & I think that's what caught me.

I was of the attitude that I  was being sooooooooooooo good and I was... with my main meals, but my snacking was my down fall, (as usual) small slice of birthday cake on Monday, shared a bit of cake on Tuesday, had a few Milk Tray sweets on Weds (sure they're only small) & we won't speak of the bars of Milka that were in the canteen at work!!!
Once I get a taste for sugar at all, I'm a divil for it and turn into the girl that "can't say no"

Say NO to Cake

Not that its a good enough excuse, I gave into it, I know my behavior is not rational when there's cake to be had and I was sorry afterwards but not sorry enough that it was a once off!!
I done it 3 days in a row and still thought that "it'd be grand" silly me!! I know I'm only fooling myself but it was just one of those weeks for me. I'd like to blame the weather, mother nature, god, the government, the voices in my head that you can't reason with BUT not myself because I had the best of intentions so that exempts me from blame!!! (I wish)

So there you have it. Cake/ my greediness is the reason why I failed to meet my holiday target and it's all my own fault!
I'm a little disappointed but it's showing me that I cant have my cake and a good weigh in, so after my holidays I'll have to give up the cake for a bit!!
Something will have to go and it needs to be my muffin top.

Muffin Top

Weight lost to date: 9.5lbs
Onwards and Downwards, the Slimming World way :)

Food Associations

Anyone that reads my blog is well aware  of my sugar addiction and my love of all things cake and biscuit related.

I love food in general but have a particular weakness when the C word is mentioned/offered/ sniffed.
Think Homer Simpson with doughnuts....

mmmmmmmm Cake

I used to have great will power and motivation. I would be so focused that I could say no to anything that was on offer and feel a little bit proud of myself for it.

But lately I can feel old habits slipping in. I can’t pass the cake shop in my local shopping center without thinking “will I” or “I’ll pick up a few for X/us as a treat” 

I am also very much an emotional eater, as in any excuse and I’m celebrating/ commiserating/ feeling happy/ sad/ bored/ cold/ bad day/ good day/ stressed

These would all be food associated feelings in my mind. Even if I’m not feeling any of the above and only popping to a friends house for a chat I stop at the shop for…. Yip you guessed it.. cake to go with the tea and chats…. (sure it would be rude to arrive empty handed)

I got so bad a couple of weeks ago that I realised that I had eaten cake at least once everyday!! I mean who eats cake EVERY SINGLE DAY? **raises hand** apparently I do!

Now that I've realised that I was doing this, I have been trying to avoid cake filled situations, this has meant less trips to the shops, supermarket (un-escorted), going to the shop hungry.

This hasn't been working out too well for me BUT I can say that I haven’t eaten cake EVERY day, but I've still been eating a lot of cake.

It’s the cake that catches me off guard that's a killer for me, why you ask? I can’t say no to it.. that’s where the problem for me lies at the moment.

When someone brings cake to the lunch room for morning tea (this seems to happen a lot lately) I take a little bit piece and say that it’ll do me, a little taste of the good stuff, but if I’m being honest, its never enough!! I’d probably eat it until a. it was gone or b. I was sick.. Whilst I walk away after having a small bit, it plays on my mind….

Its like its calling me from the kitchen and sometimes I’m  on a sweat about it.. tell myself that IF there's some still there after my lunch at 2, then I can have another piece! This is a little game that I play with myself.. Sometimes I’m relieved when I go to the kitchen and its all gone, but other times I’m disappointed because I wanted more!! It’s a vicious circle of mind games with myself!

Lately tho I've found that I’m back to associating having a cuppa with having something nice once again!! I had cut this habit out totally and used to see the cup of tea as my treat!! This isn't cutting it any more and now when I have a cuppa I feel the need to have “something”

So in the same way that people associate Saturday nights with a night on the town or a glass of wine. I associate having a cup of hot hot lovely tea with having something nice (preferably cake)

I have attempted to make the Slimming World healthy version cakes. I made the scan bran choc muffins, which were soggy bottomed and horrible and I attempted chocolate brownies, which I left in the oven for too long and became more like rocks than cake! But I will try others and hopefully find something that will help me along…

I am  trying to curb my tea and “something nice” issue at the moment (ahem, well the last 2 weeks), in that I bring my lunch and snacks to work and don’t venture outside, so its only when someone else brings a treat to work or there's a birthday in the office that there is “something nice” in the vicinity and I’m on a sweat.

It’s the evening time. I think my cuppa after my dinner is almost my favourite of the day..
I don’t have anything with this (except my daily fix of Home & Away) but this kick-starts the kettle being hit hourly until bed time if I’m not going out that evening and with that comes the voices in my head telling me to have a biscuit with my cuppa, and I do….. but then when its time for another cuppa, I’m thinking  mmmm those biscuits were nice, I think I’ll have another few…. Your seeing a pattern here aren't ya?

I’m usually the first to say, Brush your teeth, try the 20 mins rule, have fruit or yogurt instead, DON’T have another cuppa, go do something else….. But at the moment it’s a struggle and all of these ideas are good and WORK but not for me right now!!

Am I the only one who can’t take their own advise? Am I the only one who has these kind of first world problems?

I’m just a girl who can’t say no to cake even when the clothes are getting tight and the wobbly bits have extra wobble going on!!!!

Eeekkk

**Photos from Google**